Tools for Transformation

Sep 19
2012

Two Perspectives on Tools for Transformation

Dr. Amit Nagpal, New Delhi, India, and

Dr. Janet Smith Warfield, Florida, USA

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Dr. Amit Nagpal’s Perspective

Transformation – Why, When and How

Transform simply means we cross and move beyond our current form.

Why transform

Life is a journey and each birth is a step towards the final goal – enlightenment (or something similar). The soul learns its lessons through experiences, mistakes and conscious efforts to grow.

Experiences and mistakes may teach us and transform us for the better but we can learn faster (and with lesser mistakes and pain) by taking conscious efforts for our transformation. Transformation implies inner transformation, which impacts our external behavior though.

When to Transform

Only one thing is constant in this world and that is change. Transformation also becomes necessary to adapt to the external changes (adaptability) but it tends to be reactive. We can rather go for proactive change.

How to Transform

Here is a sequence of steps which can be undertaken for self-transformation:-

  1. Make a list of your areas of improvement (weaknesses or strengths to be further improved)
  2. Prioritize
  3. Set goals
  4. Take action
  5. Monitor progress
  6. Take corrective action, if required (or revise goals)

A famous saying goes;

“No matter how good intentions we may have, the world looks only at our presentations.

No matter how good presentations we may have, God looks at only our intentions.”

To fit into the world (by the way, you need to decide how much you want to fit), we need to package ourselves and manage our image/impression. But to find peace or to connect with higher consciousness/power, we must work on improving our intentions, making them more and more pure. Gratitude and positive interpretation of events helps us in purifying our intent.

I once posted on Facebook,

“When you become a little more mindful,
You become a little more soulful.
When you become a little more soulful,
You become a little more mindful.

Little by little, the journey must go on.”

It will very often happen that when you will take two steps forward, life will push you one step backward. Fine, keep trying; just keep rising every time you fail.

There will be times, you will be too depressed. It is believed that every human being seriously contemplates suicide at least once in life; we all go through trying times. You will feel that life has over-punished you for a small crime and sometimes in spite of the best of efforts, things will not work out.

Just remember, so what if life slapped you hard. Get up and carry on, because the trouble of today is the joke of tomorrow.

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Dr Amit Nagpal is a Personal Branding Consultant & Deepest Passion Coach. He is based in New Delhi, India and specializes in personal branding with a holistic touch. His philosophy is, “Enlarge as a Human Being, Excel as a Social Media Being and Evolve as a Personal Brand”

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Dr. Janet Smith Warfield’s Perspective

What is personal transformation1, and why would we want to experience it?

Personal transformation is like looking at an optical illusion. The lines, shapes, and colors on the paper don’t change. What changes is how our minds shape what is on the paper, the words we use to describe what we see, how we feel about what we see, and the actions we take as a result.

The real world is the same way. Nothing out there changes.2 What changes is the way our minds shape what is out there. Personal transformation is suddenly seeing the world through new eyes.

Do we want to see a man’s face or do we want to see the word “Liar?” Which makes us feel better? Which makes our relationships work more smoothly?

When personal transformation happens, we are suddenly free. We realize we can choose in each and every moment the perspectives, words, and actions that bring us the greatest peace and happiness.

If we desire to experience personal transformation, how do we bring it into our lives? With the optical illusion, we can’t force ourselves to see the word “Liar” if we only see a man’s face. We can’t force ourselves to see a man’s face if we only see the word “Liar.”

Likewise, we can’t force ourselves to experience personal transformation. We can only commit to using tools and practices which support shifts in perception through sudden moments of clarity. We pick a tool from the cornucopia of possibilities, try it out, and observe how it works. If we don’t like one tool, we try another until we find one we like.

Experiencing personal transformation in the real world is much more challenging than seeing the different perspectives of an optical illusion. In the real world, the perspectives we cling to are usually charged with emotion such as guilt, fear, rage, despair, or pride. If we are suffering from the shock of a spouse’s betrayal, how can we transform betrayal into trust? If we are suffering from the death of a child, how can we transform grief into life purpose and meaning?

Personal transformation in the real world is also challenging because we cling to conditioned beliefs we’ve been taught as children. Usually, we’re not even aware that our beliefs are conditioned. They may have been such wonderful guidelines that we honor them as Truth. The fact is that wonderful guidelines are never Truth. They are only tools that work in many situations for particular purposes.

Here are some time-tested tools and practices to help us go deep within, shift perspectives and see through new eyes:

  1. Journaling
  2. Meditation
  3. Vision boards
  4. Ropes courses
  5. Labyrinths
  6. Forgiveness
  7. Gratitude
  8. Mantras
  9. Drumming
  10. Toning
  11. Crystal bowls
  12. Focusing on the breath, e.g., soham breathing
  13. Heart resonance
  14. Yoga
  15. Martial arts

The list keeps growing as our awareness and creativity expand and we shift into greater and greater abundance.

Amit and I will be exploring each tool and practice in depth in subsequent blogs.

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 1. Personal Transformation is only one aspect of transformation. Other aspects are marital transformation, family transformation, community transformation, world transformation, and more.

2. Since I am writing with the intention of clarifying personal transformation, I am stating that nothing out there changes. If I were writing with the intention of clarifying intention, I would be stating that what is out there does change depending on the intentions we set.

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Dr. Janet Smith Warfield serves wisdom-seekers who want understanding and clarity so they can live peaceful, powerful, prosperous lives. Through her unique combination of holistic, creative, right-brain transformational experiences and 22 years of rigorous, left-brain law practice, she has learned how to sculpt words in atypical ways to shift her listeners into experiences beyond words, transforming turmoil into inner peace. For more information, see www.wordsculptures.com, www.wordsculpturespublishing.com, and www.janetsmithwarfield.com

Optimism, Pessimism, and Pragmatism – Which is Best?

Aug 13
2012

 

 

Two Perspectives on Optimism, Pessimism, and Pragmatism

Dr. Amit Nagpal, New Delhi, India, and

Dr. Janet Smith Warfield, Florida, USA

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Dr. Amit Nagpal’s Perspective

 
 
 
“Two men look out through the same bars,
One sees the mud, the other sees the stars.”
~Frederick Langbridge
 
 
 
 
 
 

Frederick Langbridge believed so, but I think he forgot people like me. I believe you should neither see the mud nor the stars, but rather see what is in the front. Optimism may make us unrealistic; pessimism may depress us (and make us lonely also), so pragmatism is the best policy.

But Optimism Sounds Better

People love optimistic company (and not pragmatic) and (on a lighter note) the most optimistic people end up becoming the best motivational speakers. Nobody wants pessimistic company unless you want to crib and share your pessimism at times. Also, it is easier to be a leader when you are optimistic because people have more faith in your success. Everyone is struggling in the world in some way and we all are looking for someone to motivate and inspire us all the time, more so from our leaders.

Best Case Scenario and Worst Case

Even organizations create two scenarios – best case scenario and worst case scenario. I believe neither the best happens in reality, nor the worst. What usually happens is the average. Or sometimes the best happens, sometimes the worst, and ends up on the whole with the average.

Which is Best?

Who gets the optimum in life, the optimistic, the pessimistic or the pragmatic? Should you be pragmatic for yourself and optimistic sounding with people? Should you expect the best and be prepared for the worst? Should you listen to the eternal optimist-soul or eternal pessimist-mind? Tough questions indeed and the answer is different for each person at a different point of time.

The mind is busy in feasibility studies; the soul is busy in possibility studies. The soul is divinely optimistic, the mind is animally pessimistic. You must move from the mind to the soul, which is a long journey. When you have mastered the law of attraction (or have become fully enlightened and under the influence of the soul), you can be optimistic all the time. Till then, it would be good to be pragmatic.

I can read your mind. You are wondering. “So what do you personally do?”

I ask both soul and mind, and then divide it by two.

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Dr Amit Nagpal is a Personal Branding Consultant & Deepest Passion Coach. He is based in New Delhi, India and specializes in personal branding with a holistic touch. His philosophy is, “Enlarge as a Human Being, Excel as a Social Media Being and Evolve as a Personal Brand”

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Dr. Janet Smith Warfield’s Perspective

 
 
 
 
“In every block of marble I see a statue as plain as though it stood before me, shaped and perfect in attitude and action. I have only to hew away the rough walls that imprison the lovely apparition to reveal it to the other eyes as mine see it.” ~Michelangelo
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Here’s the proverbial half full – half empty glass. Which way do you see it? How does your choice affect your emotions? How does it affect your well-being?

When we see the glass as half empty, we see possibilities that have not yet manifested. The choir director working with a newly-formed chorus sees the possibility of a beautiful, harmonious, balanced chorale, energizing and magnetizing its audience into a larger human symphony. Michelangelo saw a block of marble and envisioned David. Jesus, the Buddha, Lao Tzu, Confucius, Plato, Socrates, and many others saw human suffering and dysfunction and envisioned an all-inclusive humanity connecting needs and resources and co-creating a dynamic, peaceful, respectful, accountable, functional society.

And yet, when we see the glass as half full, aren’t we envisioning the same things? Isn’t the space at the top of the glass simply a metaphor for our unmanifested dreams, hopes, and visions for a better life and world?

How do we manifest these visions together, in harmony? Or don’t we? Do we choose instead to blow ourselves up?

 

It is All Very Simple

 

Each of us has only one soul to fix…
Each of us has only one heart to heal…
Each of us has only one head to clear…
 
our own.
 
But we need all of us.
 
Without one, there is disorder…
Without one, there is imperfection…
Without one, there is a hole in harmony…
 
no whole.
 
It is all very simple.
We all matter.
 
Previously published in
Shift: Change Your Words, Change Your World
by Dr. Janet Smith Warfield
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Dr. Janet Smith Warfield serves wisdom-seekers who want understanding and clarity so they can live peaceful, powerful, prosperous lives. Through her unique combination of holistic, creative, right-brain transformational experiences and 22 years of rigorous, left-brain law practice, she has learned how to sculpt words in atypical ways to shift her listeners into experiences beyond words, transforming turmoil into inner peace. For more information, see www.wordsculptures.com, www.wordsculpturespublishing.com www.janetsmithwarfield.com

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Additional Resources:

http://blog.ted.com/2012/06/28/the-glass-is-half-empty-and-half-full-tedglobal-2012-day-3-recap/
http://uncommonchick.com/glass-half-empty-or-half-full/
 


 



The Power of Intention

Jul 17
2012

Two Perspectives on The Power of Intention

Dr. Amit Nagpal, New Delhi, India, and

Dr. Janet Smith Warfield, Florida, USA

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Dr. Amit Nagpal’s Perspective

As I had completed a little more than one year of my passionate journey into Personal Branding Consulting, I felt the need for an annual reflection. I decided to do the introspection and reflection in the Himalayas – probably the best place in the world for contemplative practices.

The questions which were hanging in my mind were related to my intentions and the purity, clarity and parity of my intentions. (I call it the PCP of intentions)

a)  Purity – Are my intentions pure and in alignment with the universe? Are they surrounded with positive energy? Am I doing something which is blocking the manifestation of my intentions?

b)  Clarity – Are my intentions clear? What do I want in life? Why do I want it? How do I expect to get it? Does the order of my prayers match the order of my intentions (priorities)? What future course of action is required to convert my intentions into reality?

c)  Parity – I believe in Nichiren Daishonin Buddhism which says, “Earthly Desires lead to Enlightenment” It means I can ask God/Universe what I want and once my desires are satisfied, I shall be ready for enlightenment. So my daily prayers include my personal wishes. Now the question arises, “Do my prayers match (are at par) with my intentions?”

(Even from the sub-conscious mind perspective, we need to exactly visualize what we want in life and then a complete commitment to our goal creates serendipity.)

The gratitude to Universe started flowing automatically due to the natural beauty and calm of Himalayas. Thus I began my journey of self-reflection with gratitude prayers. I posted on Facebook, “In the heights of the mountains, I found the heights of my consciousness. In the depths of the valleys, I felt the depth of divine love.” Never in my life, have I felt so inspired.

Excellent ideas began to flow. I wrote probably the most beautiful (and concise) sentence I have written in my life, “If he could, he would. So don’t judge and say, he should.” The mind loves to frown and the soul loves to smile. In touch with my soul, I was all smiles. I was like a spring, “Ego is like a stubborn mountain, sometimes an emotional rock. Soul is like a free flowing spring dancing towards the ocean.”

RW Emerson said, “Once you make a decision, the Universe conspires to make it happen.” The decision Intention) must be accompanied by a complete commitment. If our desires continue to change, how can we blame God for not meeting our desires? Poor guy (God) must be so confused because we keep changing what we want and are doubtful about whether we really want it. Sometimes we are praying for the means while we want something else (ends).

Over a period of next seven days, I meditated and reflected upon these questions. The chit-chat between mind and soul began. There is a saying, “When we speak, God listens, when we become silent, God speaks (to us)”

Had I finally understood “The Secret”? I created a list of desires (intentions) which had purity, clarity and parity.

And when I reached absolute silence, God began to speak.

(And I came back with more answers than the questions I had left with.:-))

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Dr. Amit Nagpal is a Personal Branding Consultant, passionate Blogger, and Motivational Speaker based in New Delhi, India. He specializes in personal branding with a holistic touch. His philosophy is “Enlarge as a Human Being, Excel as a Social Media Being and Evolve as a Personal Brand”

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Dr. Janet Smith Warfield’s Perspective

As we approached Stonehenge on Salisbury Plain, 90 miles southwest of London, I could suddenly feel the energy shift. Before us lay miles and miles of open grasslands, gently rolling hills, burial mounds, and peaceful mists. It was as if I had been transported back in time to a space held sacred by a Neolithic culture.

We had passed the restrictive energy of the military complexes surrounding Salisbury Plain. Now, I was beginning to feel the sanctity of the natural environment. Despite a parking lot crowded with tourists, I did not want to take pictures. I wanted to hold the awe of a mystery I couldn’t explain. I wanted to experience amazement over the dedication of those unknown human beings, thousands of years ago, who hauled those massive sarsens, blue stones, and lintels from miles away, then found a way to set them upright, raise the lintels to the top of the sarsens, and chisel them so they were stable and all fitted seamlessly together. I had clearly set my intention not to get sucked into the chaotic tourist chatter in the parking lot.

What I experienced was a mystery my mind could not understand. What I received was peace, awe, amazement, gratitude, connection, unity, wholeness, and sanctity. Had I shifted my intention to taking pictures of a physical place, I would have lost an amazing energetic healing experience. I would have mentally divided the experience into a subject/object relationship with “me” taking pictures of “Stonehenge”.

On the way back, I shifted my intention. This time, I wanted the pictures as a memento of a wonderful experience. I mentally split the energetic field into myself as photographer and Stonehenge as object. The experience was totally different. I had my mementos.

Intention is everything! It sets the direction of each and every moment of our lives, focuses our attention and actions, and allows us to manifest whatever we desire.

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Dr. Janet Smith Warfield serves wisdom-seekers who want understanding and clarity so they can live peaceful, powerful, prosperous lives. Through her unique combination of holistic, creative, right-brain transformational experiences and 22 years of rigorous, left-brain law practice, she has learned how to sculpt words in atypical ways to shift her listeners into experiences beyond words, transforming turmoil into inner peace. For more information, see www.wordsculptures.com, www.wordsculpturespublishing.com, www.janetsmithwarfield.com

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What is Transformational Leadership?

Jun 19
2012

Two Perspectives on Transformational Leadership

Dr. Amit Nagpal, New Delhi, India, and

Dr. Janet Smith Warfield, Florida, USA

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Dr. Amit Nagpal’s Perspective

Become a leader who transforms by being a thought leader.

I am not going to talk about what is transformational leadership. I am not going to impose my views. I will not even tell you how to become a transformational leader. Now you must be thinking, “Then what the hell are you going to do?”

I had once posted on Facebook, “Your secret is in your soul, my secret is in my soul and still they tell you to read ‘The Secret’” Even Lord Buddha said, “Everyone must find his own way to salvation.” Why should we have any one definition of transformational leadership? Why not ask your soul and come up with your own definition? We all can be transformational leaders in our own ways, whether we transform our village, our workplace, our family or even one friend. When we connect to our deepest self, and become authentic in expressing our true self, we will automatically become a leader who transforms and a thought leader who leads by example.

Albert Einstein said, “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.” Are you a fish who is trying to climb the tree? Is your organization making you a square peg (unfit) in a round hole?

Start the journey of finding your genius. When you find your genius, you will become a leader who transforms by being a thought leader. I will just tell you one possible approach or a road map to thought leadership. You have to undertake your own journey, I can only support you, inspire you and give a suggested road map which you can modify or even use to get an idea to develop your own road map.

Here is my three step approach to thought leadership:-

Step 1

Walk the Walk

Connect with your deepest self through contemplative practice, expressing yourself through arts or appreciating art in a way that it becomes your muse or source of inspiration.

Develop your own concept of thought leadership. Stay in the company of thought leaders and find inspiration. Respect your genius and it will make you a thought leader. I remember another quote of Einstein, “The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant.” Honour your gift to bring out your hidden greatness. Let the silent-intuitive mind take over and make you a thought leader in your own right. Take the action to develop models, philosophy, equations, and diagrams and so on which can depict your ideas.

Step 2

Talk the Talk

Communicate your authentic core to the people around. Share your thought leadership with people who are going to either support you or criticize you constructively (to help you refine your concept further).

Help the people understand your thought leadership model. Unless you help them gain in-depth understanding of your ideas, they will have a superficial understanding only. Even God had to communicate his message through epics, religious books and inspired messages to her channels. Never claim to be a thought leader and let the people validate your thought leadership.

Step 3

Walk the Talk

You are in the implementation phase now. Fine tune whenever you feel like it. Apply the thought leadership to your own life or to the lives of people/organisations you know. Demonstrate results. Counter the opposition with conviction and determination.

“Easier said than done” they say. Contemplation is fine to connect with the deepest self but at the end of the day life is action, not contemplation. Start the spark and fuel the fire. I once jokingly told a client, “Coins make noise and notes don’t. As you grow from 1 rupee coin to 10 rupee coin to a 1,000 rupees note, make less and less noise.” So become humbler by the day. I always tell my clients, “Larger the stature, Briefer the profile”

You have walked enough, you have talked enough, and the time has come to ‘Walk the Talk’. Leave your own footprint of transformation through your ‘Thought Leadership’.

One day, leadership has to die because everyone will become capable enough to lead himself/herself (by mastering the mind and by connecting to the soul.). One day everyone will be a thought leader. You want to be an innovator or a laggard. The life is yours, the choice is yours.

http://suewaters.wikispaces.com/

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Dr. Amit Nagpal is a Personal Branding Consultant, passionate Blogger, and Motivational Speaker based in New Delhi, India. He specializes in personal branding with a holistic touch. His philosophy is “Take Charge of your Life and your Brand” He writes a Blog, “The Joys of Teaching
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Dr. Janet Smith Warfield’s Perspective

“The next Buddha might not be an individual. It might be a group” Thich Nhat Hanh

A MetaHub of a dozen brilliant, talented, aware women have self-organized out of Barbara Marx Hubbard’s Agents of Conscious Evolution Mentors, http://bit.ly/KzuGiC, to dialog about any subject any of them wants to discuss. The topics are not about hair styles or the latest fashions. They are about how to heal ourselves, how to heal our planet, and how to co-create harmony, resonance, and alignment with one another. Each speaks into the circle from her heart. Each listens deeply to the others’ words. New ears and perspectives hear the information offered into the circle. New speakers add their own nuances, perspectives, and understandings. Ultimately, the dialog carries everyone to a clearer and more expanded understanding of the topic being discussed. Disparate viewpoints coalesce into alignment and resonance. Conflicts dissipate as new information enters the circle. Everyone comes together to solve problems.

Is this a new style of leadership? If so, what do we call it? Field leadership? Essence Leadership? Circle Leadership? Transformational leadership? Are we co-creating the Noosphere which Teihard de Chardin wrote about so many years ago, simply by exchanging information through deep, heartfelt, mutually-respective dialog?

Talking circles are not new. Indigenous people in North America have used them for millennia. Circles of stones or wood can be found all over Europe, some dating back 5,000 years or more. Circles bring people together, co-creating positive transformation for all. As Living Justice Press states:

Circles are far more than a technique; they are a way of life. Circles embody a philosophy, principles, and values that apply whether people are sitting in Circle or not. http://bit.ly/L3SE8r

Characteristics of Transformational Leadership:

  1. All inclusive – everyone belongs and has the right to speak
  2. Everyone is equal
  3. Those who are not speaking are listening deeply
  4. Can be used in any setting with any topic
  5. Draws on our best values
  6. Solutions evolve organically
  7. Endlessly adaptable and co-creative
  8. Helps participants respond from their best selves because they are being heard rather than suppressed.
  9. Builds community
  10. Generates mutual understanding and respect
  11. Honors all voices equally
  12. Decisions are made by consensus
  13. Cultivates mutual support
  14. Honors the gifts, knowledge, talent and experiences each participant brings.

There are many modern circle groups engaged in this kind of transformational community building and leadership. Two I can recommend are Vistar Circles, http://www.vistarfoundation.org/ and Circle Connections, http://circleconnections.com/. They continue to be used because they bring to every participant such a wonderful sense of inclusiveness and community building. When a circle is formally over, the participants rarely want to leave the safe, free-flowing space they have created together.

 

Perhaps Thich Nhat Hanh was right. The next Buddha is all of us co-creating together in peace and harmony.

Additional Resources

  1. First Nations Pedagogy Online (Circle Talks) – http://bit.ly/KxrgSa
  2. Living Justice Press – http://bit.ly/MueLo4

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Dr. Janet Smith Warfield serves wisdom-seekers who want understanding and clarity so they can live peaceful, powerful, prosperous lives. Through her unique combination of holistic, creative, right-brain transformational experiences and 22 years of rigorous, left-brain law practice, she has learned how to sculpt words in atypical ways to shift her listeners into experiences beyond words, transforming turmoil into inner peace. For more information, see www.wordsculptures.com, www.wordsculpturespublishing.com, www.janetsmithwarfield.com

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Mind Mapping

May 17
2012

Two Perspectives on Mind Mapping

Dr. Amit Nagpal, New Delhi, India, and

Dr. Janet Smith Warfield, Florida, USA

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Dr. Amit Nagpal’s Perspective

Mind Mapping as a Process

What is a Mind Map?

A mind map is a graphical and simple way to represent ideas and concepts. It helps in structuring information, and as a result helps in better analysis, comprehension, synthesis, recall and idea generation.

 

Why Should I Mind Map?

Our brain consists of neurons and each neuron is connected to several other neurons in a web kind of structure. In a mind map also, information is structured in a non-linear way that resembles how our brain actually works. Since it is an analytical as well as artistic activity, it engages the brain in a more useful way (utilizing both left and right parts of the brain) and due to its artistic and colourful nature it is fun.

Benefits of Mind Maps

  1. Taking notes in a class or meeting
  2. Brainstorming and creative problem solving
  3. Making plans
  4. Presenting information
  5. Synthesizing information
  6. Time management
  7. Decision making
  8. Summarizing a book, article or blog post

 

How to Make a Mind Map

I learned mind-mapping from Ms. SadaNam Kaur, a Life Coach based in Spain. (I am doing a self leadership course which has mind mapping as part of the creativity module).

The following points need to be kept in mind while making a mind map:

  • Start the mind map in the centre of page and use the page in landscape format.
  • Core topic will be in the centre and sub-topics will be in periphery.
  • Topic labels should be single word as far as possible and when possible use a picture.
  • The lines radiating from the centre will be thick and will become thinner as they move into the periphery (groups/branches).
  • Different colours are used to make it artistic and attractive.
  • Pictures are also used to make it attractive.
  • It is not linear but radiant/web like
  • There are no sentences, so words are used in a way which suggest sentences e.g. in the mind map below under drawing there are 3 points viz words, 1000 and picture which means a picture says a thousand words.
  • As lines become thinner as they radiate towards the periphery, the word (font) also becomes smaller signifying the importance of those words in the mind map.
  • The lines should be connected starting from the central image/word.

A Final Word

According to Wilkipedia, a British psychology author is considered the inventor of modern mind-mapping. Buzan argues that while “traditional” outlines force readers to scan left to right and top to bottom, readers actually tend to scan the entire page in a non-linear fashion. Buzan also uses popular assumptions about the cerebral hemispheres in order to promote the exclusive use of mind mapping over other forms of note making. The mind map continues to be used in various forms, and for various applications including learning and education (where it is taught as “mind webs”, or “webbing”), planning, and in engineering diagramming.

YouTube video: What is Mind Mapping?
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Dr. Amit Nagpal is a Personal Branding Consultant, passionate Blogger, and Motivational Speaker based in New Delhi, India. He specializes in personal branding with a holistic touch. His philosophy is “Take Charge of your Life and your Brand” He writes a Blog, “The Joys of Teaching
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Dr. Janet Smith Warfield’s Perspective

Dr. Janet Smith Warfield

Mind Mapping for Clarity

Mind mapping is a process that weaves together related thoughts and ideas to bring clarity and meaning into your life. You can do it in the privacy of your own home.

Set aside a time when you won’t be interrupted. Get yourself a pen and a pad of paper and write down whatever thoughts flow through your mind. If you’re struggling with a problem, begin with that. If there’s something you want to bring into your life, begin with that. Do not censor your thoughts. If you censor your thoughts, you’ll stay stuck in exactly the same thought patterns that created the problem in the first place or prevented you from moving toward what you want to do with your life.

Remind yourself that no one except you has to see what you write. The thoughts that flow through your mind and onto your paper are for your eyes alone unless you choose to share them. When you’re finished writing, you can burn or shred the paper if you want.

Approach your writing with a sense of exploration and discovery. Don’t judge or condemn what comes out. Just step back and notice it. Mmmmmmmmmm! That’s interesting. I had no idea that thought was in my head. What message is it bringing me? What can I learn? Is it telling me something about an action step that would move me toward solving my problem or giving me information about what I want to bring into my life? What meaning is it bringing? Is it adding a new piece to the puzzle I’m trying to solve?

When you notice resistance to one of the thoughts flowing through your mind, ask yourself why. Is it a thought that you were told was evil? Does it make you feel guilty? Does it bring up anger or fear? Just notice, then choose to appreciate it for the clarity it has brought you or tuck it back down into the recesses of your mind. This may simply not be the right time to hear the message the thought is bringing.

As you allow your thoughts to spill out onto the paper, notice if you experience sudden clarity that you didn’t have before. Notice if you feel an energetic shift in your body. Which thoughts make you feel good? Which thoughts make you feel bad?  Which keep returning over and over? The thoughts that keep returning over and over are thoughts that are desperately trying to bring you a message. What are they telling you about what you need to change in your life?

Notice if your thoughts are about other people and how they should change. Notice if your thoughts are about things that happened in the past or things that may happen in the future. When you focus on what other people should think, say, or do or when you focus on the past or future, you give away your present personal power.

Take your power back by keeping your mind in the present moment, trusting it, and trusting the process that is always there to support you when you are open to receiving and appreciating that support. You can call this process “God,” “Higher Power,” “Universal Energy,” or any other name you want to give it. It wants you to be joyful, prosperous, and powerful. You simply need to be willing to receive what it has to offer.

The alignment you experience brings you coherence, balance, clarity, courage, understanding, integrity, and peace. You end up trusting your gut, trusting your thoughts, trusting your intuition, and trusting your life. Your power comes from working with your own emotions, actions, thoughts, and energetic system, right here, right now, in each and every moment. By doing this, you create your own sacred space, an internal alignment with your own being and integrity. This is the only place where you are always safe.

For more information, here’s a good YouTube video: Using Mind Mapping to Gain Clarity

________________________________________________________________________________________Dr. Janet Smith Warfield serves wisdom-seekers who want understanding and clarity so they can live peaceful, powerful, prosperous lives. Through her unique combination of holistic, creative, right-brain transformational experiences and 22 years of rigorous, left-brain law practice, she has learned how to sculpt words in atypical ways to shift her listeners into experiences beyond words, transforming turmoil into inner peace. To learn more, see www.wordsculptures.com, www.wordsculpturespublishing.com, www.janetsmithwarfield.com

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Loyalty

Apr 16
2012

Two Perspectives on Loyalty

Dr. Amit Nagpal, New Delhi, India, and

Dr. Janet Smith Warfield, Florida, USA

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Dr. Amit Nagpal’s Perspective

The “L” alphabet probably has the most difficult and confusing terms. Love and loyalty are two of them. It is easier to be an opportunist than to be loyal. But loyalty pays you in the long run. It inspires trust, it creates a reputation and it contributes to your personal brand.

Some people even say love and loyalty are the same. So what is the meaning of loyalty? What is the definition of loyalty?

What loyalty means to me

When I say, my friend is loyal to me, it generally means;-

  • He considers my enemies as his enemies.
  • He will not backbite against me.
  • He will protest or argue or defend if someone criticizes me.
  • He will be a friend in need.
  • He will not publicly complain, even if he has a grudge against me and rather discuss privately.
  • He will stand by my side, even if my parents criticize me and will share his opinion with me in private and try to be non-judgmental and yet give me friendly advice or tell me if I am wrong.

Loyalty – another misused word

Should we commit violence and murder in the name of loyalty? Some people cut their fingers in India when their political leaders lose the elections. Is this loyalty? Does being loyal mean emotionally overwhelmed and unstable?

If a man commits murder to loot a person to save his ailing mother, is it loyalty? Many Hindi (Indian) films have similar dilemmas. Were those Indians who were loyal to the British Empire traitors to the nation? I am leaving for the readers to decide. Nothing is right or wrong. Our inner voice knows what is wrong and right in that particular situation.

How do we learn loyalty?

I think we learn loyalty mainly from our parents and their behavior. Of course, perceptions and behavior relating to loyalty among friends, relatives, siblings and teachers also influence us. It is also possible you may be influenced more by your grandparent than your parent and he/she being your role model becomes the role model for loyalty too.

Clash of loyalties

A woman should be more loyal to husband or parents? The question is as difficult to answer as whether an Indian NRI in USA should be more loyal to India or to United States. My personal opinion is to be equally loyal, for the native country, you have emotional loyalty and for the country of residence, you need to have logical loyalty (it is feeding you and in India we say, you have to be loyal to the salt). Over a period of time if the husband is very caring or the country of residence gives you a very caring environment, you will develop emotional loyalty to husband or the country of residence.

True loyalty

The most difficult loyalty is the loyalty to truth or God. It is easier to be loyal to human relationships but difficult to stay loyal to the right, to the truth or to the conscience.

Our inner voice also wants us to be loyal to truth. But it is easier said than done.

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Dr. Amit Nagpal is a Personal Branding Consultant, passionate Blogger, and Motivational Speaker based in New Delhi, India. He specializes in personal branding with a holistic touch. His philosophy is “Take Charge of your Life and your Brand” He writes a Blog, “The Joys of Teaching

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Dr. Janet Smith Warfield’s Perspective

Dr. Janet Smith WarfieldEncarta Dictionary defines loyalty as “a feeling of devotion, duty, or attachment to somebody or something.” But who is that “somebody” or “something” to which we feel devotion, duty or attachment? And to what extent should we carry out that devotion, duty and attachment? And what do we do when we experience a conflict of loyalties? These are not easy questions.

As children, we are very attached to our parents, regardless of whether they are loving or abusive. We have little choice, because we depend on them for our food, clothing, and shelter.

As we grow, we begin to make friends. Why do we choose some over others? Isn’t it because we meet each others’ needs and we feel comfortable in each others’ presence? Here there is a reciprocity of loyalty.

As we reach adulthood, we begin to look for a mate. How do we decide who is worthy of our loyalty for a lifetime commitment? If we choose well, we marry someone who is kind, loving, sensitive, strong, compassionate, and communicative – someone with whom we can build a true marriage of values. If we make a mistake, we choose someone who has affairs, doesn’t carry his or her share of responsibilities, and isn’t there for our children.

And how do we handle a conflict of loyalties? Our parents want us to study medicine and become a doctor. Our spouse wants us to study law. Our heart tells us our happiness lies with art.

We don’t always know when we first meet a new person how loyal and trustworthy he or she will be. It is only when we feel betrayed that we realize we chose to place our loyalty with someone who didn’t deserve it. Do we stay with this person for the sake of loyalty, or do we leave a relationship where loyalty is not mutual?

What about loyalty to our country? A young man is drafted to fight for his country and trained to kill other young men. In some countries, his only choice is to kill or be killed. Is this the proper place to put his loyalty? Or should he become a conscientious objector? Becoming a conscientious objector may be a far more courageous choice than being loyal to a dictator.

William E. Gladstone wrote, “… in freedom you lay the firmest foundations both of loyalty and order.

Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “Trust your instinct to the end, though you can render no reason.”

Perhaps our first loyalty should be to ourselves and whatever God or Higher Power or Universal Energy we believe in. Be true to yourself and you will be loyal to those people and causes that have earned your loyalty.

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Dr. Janet Smith Warfield serves wisdom-seekers who want understanding and clarity so they can live peaceful, powerful, prosperous lives. Through her unique combination of holistic, creative, right-brain transformational experiences and 22 years of rigorous, left-brain law practice, she has learned how to sculpt words in atypical ways to shift her listeners into experiences beyond words, transforming turmoil into inner peace. To learn more, see www.wordsculptures.com, www.wordsculpturespublishing.com, www.janetsmithwarfield.com

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The Subconscious – Tapping Its Enormous Power

Mar 12
2012

Two Perspectives on The Subconscious – Tapping Its Enormous Power

Dr. Amit Nagpal, New Delhi, India, and

Dr. Janet Smith Warfield, Florida, USA

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Dr. Amit Nagpal’s Perspective

Before we learn to tap the enormous power of the sub-conscious, we need to first understand what is the difference between conscious and sub-conscious mind.

Conscious Mind

Many of us wonder if everyone is appreciative of the sub-conscious mind and critical of conscious mind, why did God create the conscious mind in the first place. Is the conscious mind obsolete?

Conscious mind is needed by human beings but it should be treated like a servant. Since most of the population does not know how to activate and utilize the enormous power of sub-conscious, the conscious mind runs the show. No wonder Albert Einstein said, “The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift.”

Sri Aurobindo, the Indian sage, said that just as the monkey’s tail disappeared during the evolution of the human being because it was no longer required, similarly the conscious mind will disappear as human beings evolve.

Sub-conscious Mind

Subconscious mind gives us wisdom and intuition and is activated mainly by three activities viz. deep relaxation, meditation and mental imagery/visualization. It also tends to get active during deep sleep (no wonder many people say sleep over your problem and you will wake up with the answer) but deep sleep is out of our control (we often forget the dreams) and whether we will have sound/deep sleep or not is often beyond the control of an average person.

Unconscious Mind

There is a difference of opinion between scientists here. Some believe mind only has two parts conscious and unconscious (call it sub-conscious if you wish) while others believe that mind has three parts viz. conscious, sub-conscious and unconscious. I believe in the latter school of thought and I believe conscious is often negative, sub-conscious is generally wise/positive and unconscious has all the repressed memories (both positive and negative). So what comes out during past regression therapy and hypnotherapy are the memories stored in the unconscious mind.

A Final Word

Silence the conscious mind and the sub-conscious will get activated. The conscious can be silenced through Sufi dances, meditation and whole lot of concentration exercises and contemplative practices.

Sub-conscious makes us wise, intuitive and highly creative. But to tap its enormous power requires enormous hard work. We tend to be so busy in our mechanical-routine lives, we hardly have time even to think on these lines. And we keep postponing whatever can be postponed until we reach a crisis.

Abba Eban said, “History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives.” Will we start tapping our sub-conscious only when we have exhausted all other alternatives and made a complete fool of ourselves?

The choice is ours.

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Dr. Amit Nagpal is a Personal Branding Consultant, passionate Blogger, and Motivational Speaker based in New Delhi, India. He specializes in personal branding with a holistic touch. His philosophy is “Take Charge of your Life and your Brand” He writes a Blog, “The Joys of Teaching

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Dr. Janet Smith Warfield’s Perspective

What do we mean when we talk about the subconscious? How can we tap into its power to enhance our effectiveness?

Our subconscious and conscious minds are like an iceberg. The conscious mind is the tip we can see. It is that small part of awareness that is above the surface, the part on which we are currently focused, the part that is obvious, right here, right now, to our five senses. The subconscious mind lies below the surface. It is an enormous source of untapped resources we don’t normally see. What we don’t see, we can’t use to support our lives, our communities, and our world. When we tap into our subconscious and bring its energetic power to the surface, we mine its abundance and use its resources to enhance both our own lives and the lives of all around us. We tap into the depths to experience the light.

There are parts of our subconscious we don’t want to see because they hurt too much or are too frightening. We don’t want to look at our fear until we develop phobias. We don’t want to look at our pain and rage until we’ve experienced deep betrayal and loss. We don’t want to look at our guilt until we’re ready to say, “I’m sorry” and change our conduct. We don’t want to look at our self-righteousness until we are willing and able to walk in another’s shoes.

I’d like to invite you to a mutual mind-mapping game with the intention of engaging both you and me in tapping into the power of our individual subconscious minds. Then we can shape the energy we discover and transform it into powerful tools for transforming our lives.

I’m going to put my thoughts “out there”. As you read my thoughts, just notice your own thoughts and emotions. Your mind may be saying, “Oh, that’s neat. I hadn’t thought of that before.” Or your mind may be saying, “Is she nuts? That doesn’t make sense at all.”  What your mind says doesn’t matter. Just notice where your mind and emotions are taking you when you read my words. Notice whether you are feeling an attraction, a resistance, or no emotional charge at all.

What you feel doesn’t matter. Just notice the energy of that feeling. You are observing your subconscious by using Witness mode – the detached portion of yourself looking at the mentally and emotionally involved part of yourself. Then begin your own mind mapping process, starting with what you notice about your own thoughts and emotions. Are you focused on the meanings of my words? Are you feeling attraction? Curiosity? Resistance? Play? Fear? Write down whatever flows through your mind – without censorship.

The “without censorship” is vital. That is how you bypass the conditioned thinking of the conscious mind – the mind you’ve been taught is all that is; the mind you’ve been taught is right, the mind that wears dark glasses so it doesn’t have to look at things it doesn’t want to see below the tip of the iceberg, beneath the surface of consciousness.

If and when you and I become willing to explore the unending depths of our own subconscious, we discover a never-ending, fertile, playground for exploration, discovery, creativity, and self-empowerment. Sometimes our subconscious takes us on joyous rides of ecstasy. Other times it takes us into deep, dark caverns of terror, rage, and guilt. Like St. John of the Cross, our subconscious offers us spiritual opportunities to come face to face with our own dark night of the soul, master our emotions, integrate our spiritual gifts of deepening understanding and clarity, and shift into fuller awareness, consciousness, power, and peace. The change in our own energy is the enormous power that indirectly changes the lives of those around us. This is the space where synchronicities abound and miracles happen.

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Dr. Janet Smith Warfield serves wisdom-seekers who want understanding and clarity so they can live peaceful, powerful, prosperous lives. Through her unique combination of holistic, creative, right-brain transformational experiences and 22 years of rigorous, left-brain law practice, she has learned how to sculpt words in atypical ways to shift her listeners into experiences beyond words, transforming turmoil into inner peace. To learn more, see www.wordsculptures.com, www.wordsculpturespublishing.com, www.janetsmithwarfield.com

 

What Matters Most?

Feb 09
2012

Two Perspectives on What Matters Most

Dr. Amit Nagpal, New Delhi, India, and

Janet Smith Warfield, J.D., Florida, USA

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Dr. Amit Nagpal’s Perspective

Do we really know what matters most to us? Just give it a second deeper thought, “Do we?”

I came across something very touching in this regard on Facebook recently. It was a photo with the message, “The greatest discovery in the world is to discover yourself.” Very often we are running the rat race or living a life dictated by society because we do not even know what matters most to us and what do we truly want or value in life.

After observing many people over the past 10-15 years, I have reached a conclusion that most of the people chase money or love during their entire adult life depending on what they lacked the most in childhood. If one was born into a rich family where parents hardly had time and one was starved of affection as a child, one often becomes affection-centric . On the other hand, if one was born into a poor family and always saw a shortage of money and material, one tends to become money-centric. We need to realize these imbalances in our personality and try to develop a holistic attitude towards life. A balance of money and material is necessary for true happiness.

Very often we run the rat race thinking that we are making all this money for our family, while family is no more interested in money and wants our time and affection. We think what we want the most is money but on deeper reflection, we realize what we want is a happy family (and of course a clear conscience that we are providing the best possible to our loved ones.)

We should not assume our own needs or the needs of others. We need to rather reflect deeply to understand what matters most to us. To an average human being what matters most is emotional and financial security or in other words the need to be loved and have sufficient material to meet our needs.

No wonder we often feel so empty inside even after becoming millionaires and billionaires. I once posted on Facebook, “The rats are running the rat race while the cool cat enjoys the tamasha from the sidelines.” Once we have understood what matters most to us then we need to balance between our own needs and the needs of our loved ones.

Only such a delicate balance can bring us true happiness and joy. At times, such a balance can feel like walking a tight rope but I assure you it is worth the trouble.

After all anything worth its salt comes at a price.

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Dr. Amit Nagpal is a Personal Branding Consultant, passionate Blogger, and Motivational Speaker based in New Delhi, India. He specializes in personal branding with a holistic touch. His philosophy is “Take Charge of your Life and your Brand” He writes a Blog, “The Joys of Teaching

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Janet Smith Warfield’s Perspective

Well, what does matter most? Things? People? Love? Living your values?

What if we simplify the question. What if we ask instead, “What matters most right here, right now, in this moment? And what if we add “What matters most right here, right now, in this moment, to you.”

Not always easy to answer, even when we narrow it down to the present moment and you. But it is far easier than asking the general question we started out with, “What matters most?”

So many things matter: our homes, our families, our pets, our jobs, our cars, our lawns, our communities, our churches.

                           

And what about love, peace of mind, non-violence, freedom, courage, truth, honesty, accountability, gratitude, service? Don’t these matter, too?

Molokai - Southeastern Shore

You are the only one who can answer the question what matters most. Yes, you can simplify the question by limiting it to right here, right now, and to you personally. Please do that. Why? Because life is always changing and what matters most today may not be what matters most tomorrow.

You do need to decide on your priorities – for yourself – right here, right now. Which is more important to you, right here, right now? To wash the car or play soccer with your son? To watch the football game on TV or spend quality time with your wife? To paint the house or call your parents to say ‘hello?’ To rest or work on that job for the office? Only you can decide. Go with your gut. Do what you want to do or need to do, not what you ought to do.

As you choose your priorities moment by moment, you’ll see patterns emerging. What activities do you choose to do most? This tells you something about your overall values.

If you spend your life working at a job you hate, come home angry, shout at your wife, and slump into a chair to watch TV, perhaps what matters most is simply physical survival – earning enough money to pay for food, shelter, electricity, water, a car, and other physical items. But is that all that matters?

What about your emotional and spiritual needs?  Do you need less stress and more joy? Do you need to take action to improve your self-esteem? Do you need the motivation, discipline and intention to look for a better source of income that pays more money, requires less work, and brings you joy and challenge? Are you willing to do what it takes to go back to school and get that degree that didn’t matter at all when you were sixteen?

                                                  

Whatever you decide, you’ll be able to do more things that matter if you organize your time and resources. Get all your errands done in one trip. Plan ahead so you don’t have to retrace your steps.

You’ll also be more effective if you pace yourself through your tasks and finish each one before you begin another. That way, you don’t pressure yourself and put yourself under stress. What you don’t finish today will be waiting tomorrow for your time and attention.

Block out time for each thing that matters. Even ten minutes of quality time with your wife is better than a day of arguing because you’re overstressed.

Simplify your life. There are many things you are doing that don’t need to be done, right here, right now, by you. What are they? Let them go and simply do what matters most.

Most important, make sure you take time for yourself. Sleep when you need to sleep. Eat when you are hungry. Meditate when you need to get centered. Be open to receiving gifts and support systems that are all around you when your eyes and heart and mind are open to receiving them. Then watch the miracles happen.

When you take time to re-center yourself, all your tasks and relationships work more smoothly. What matters most emerges in each moment. What emerges that truly matters most is the strength, clarity, intention, focus, and motivation to bring about your deepest desires.

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Janet Smith Warfield serves wisdom-seekers who want understanding and clarity so they can live peaceful, powerful, prosperous lives. Through her unique combination of holistic, creative, right-brain transformational experiences and 22 years of rigorous, left-brain law practice, she has learned how to sculpt words in atypical ways to shift her listeners into experiences beyond words, transforming turmoil into inner peace. To learn more, see www.wordsculptures.com, www.janetsmithwarfield.com; and www.wordsculpturespublishing.com.

Moving from Fear to Compassion

Jan 15
2012

Two Perspectives on Moving from Fear to Compassion

Dr. Amit Nagpal, New Delhi, India, and

Janet Smith Warfield, J.D., Florida, USA

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Dr. Amit Nagpal’s Perspective

We stay in a state of fear most of the time – the fear of hurting our body, the fear of getting hurt in love, the fear of failure, the fear of not meeting goals at work, the fear of losing our job and so on. Most of the time our fears are expressions of emotional baggage because we expect the past experience to repeat itself. ‘Once bitten, twice shy’ has a very interesting equivalent in Hindi which means the one who got burnt by hot milk drinks even cold buttermilk with caution.

Someone has rightly said, Fear or F.E.A.R. stands for False Evidence Appearing Real. Most of the time our fears are imaginary. Sometimes we may have deep rooted fears also, which we try to overcome very hard but fail again and again. Let’s say every time a blind person tries to walk on his own, he gets hurt. He has a very justified reason for fear. But still if one persists, tries to learn from the experience and acts with determination, fear can be overcome most of the time.

The well known book by Dale Carnegie, “How to Stop Worrying and Start Living” forces us to reflect. Firstly worry arises from fear and when you live with fear, you are not living fully. Secondly when you release the fear (after becoming aware of your fears), then only you can start living a truly joyful life.

How do we release fears and move from fear to compassion. We need to replace each thought of fear with compassion. Let us take few examples. Supposing you have a fear of dogs. Just remember that positive vibrations tend to invite positive vibrations in return. Look at the dogs with compassion. As you replace your fearful thoughts with compassionate thoughts, you will notice that the dogs will stop barking at you or become less aggressive.

Let us take another example. Many people have a fear of crime in developing countries. Have you ever realized that when you send vibrations of fear, you may attract more crime or thieves? After all the fear will be often visible in your face/body language and will give hints to the wrong people that you are feeling scared. Once a client asked me, “If I become a good human being, aren’t people more likely to misuse me?” I replied, “First become a smart human being and then become a good human being.”

Moving to compassion does not mean becoming compassionate to criminals and thieves. (In fact that is also possible but at a very advanced stage.) But an average person needs to become smart enough so that the tendency of fear of being cheated or fooled comes down. As a result it becomes easier for us to be compassionate and even develop a strong sense of intuition and recognizing the negative vibes in people.

Filling ourselves with positive emotions of gratitude for the universe is very helpful in moving from fear to compassion. I once posted on Facebook, “The universe wants its abundance to flow freely. We only, block it with negative thoughts, lack of faith and often due to lack of gratitude. If we are not grateful to universe for what we have already received, what is the guarantee that we will be grateful, if we get more?”

Our attitude towards problems and challenges is critical to let the fear go. We need to understand that ups and downs are part of life and life cannot be a straight line. As the joke goes, “The only time ECG graph is a straight line is when you are dead.”

Here is a nice video on fear and worry from Robin Sharma, the well known leadership guru and motivational speaker.

How to Defeat Worry

So stop acting with fear and start acting with compassion.

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Dr. Amit Nagpal is a Personal Branding Consultant, passionate Blogger, and Motivational Speaker based in New Delhi, India. He specializes in personal branding with a holistic touch. His philosophy is “Take Charge of your Life and your Brand” He writes a Blog, “The Joys of Teaching

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Janet Smith Warfield’s Perspective

As I walked into the personal growth workshop, the facilitators asked me what I hoped to gain from the weekend. I knew that answer. I desperately wanted to release my fear.

I was afraid of what other people might think, what other people might do, conflict, losing relationships, being different, making a fool of myself. I had been betrayed many times. I was afraid to trust. Most of all, I was afraid of my fear.

As the workshop began, the facilitators asked us to make four commitments: don’t chew gum, don’t interrupt, be on time, and do whatever we were told.

I had no problem with the first three requests. I never chewed gum, I didn’t often speak in front of strangers, and being punctual mattered.

However, I had a problem with the last request—doing whatever we were told. History had taught me that humans had ordered other humans to rape, pillage, steal, and kill.

I was conflicted. I didn’t want to agree. On the other hand, I wanted to learn how to release my fear, and I was afraid of being different and losing the workshop I had paid to attend. Reluctantly, I said yes.

My decision nagged me all week as I waited for the second workshop to begin. I knew the facilitators would demand the same four commitments. Was I going to cave in again and agree? I decided I was not. I was terrified.

Sleepless night after sleepless night, I tossed and turned. What would the facilitators say? How would the other participants act? How should I prepare? My what-ifs continued to torment me.

Fortunately, I had had several years in NarAnon, a support group for families and friends of addicts. NarAnon had taught me I couldn’t fix anyone else. I could only fix myself. NarAnon taught that I needed the help of a Power greater than myself. It suggested “Let go and let God.”

I didn’t much like that word “God.” It always made me think of an old man with a long white beard, sitting on a thundercloud with a lightening bolt in his hand, waiting to strike me dead if I didn’t do some unclear thing he wanted me to do. I had always considered myself an intellectual agnostic.

I did like the words “Power greater than myself” better than the word “God.” However, I had to deal with my terror somehow, I couldn’t do it by myself, and I didn’t have time to engage in the niceties of semantics.

Tears streaming down my face, I threw myself to my knees on the living room floor and pleaded, “God help me!”

Suddenly, a magnificent calm flooded my body. Together, I knew we could handle it.

The second workshop began. Again, the facilitators asked us to make the four commitments. I refused to agree to do whatever I was told.

The room turned surly. The facilitators said the workshop could not continue until every one agreed. Ultimately, they walked out, leaving me alone with a furious group of participants.

Bill had taken time off from work to attend the workshop. Jane was paying for a babysitter so that she could attend. Raymond slammed his fist on the table. Mary screamed in my face. John called me an uncooperative bitch. I felt nothing but compassion and love.

The facilitators returned and asked me to leave the workshop. It no longer mattered. I had received exactly what I came to get—release of my fear.

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Janet Smith Warfield serves wisdom-seekers who want understanding and clarity so they can live peaceful, powerful, prosperous lives. Through her unique combination of holistic, creative, right-brain transformational experiences and 22 years of rigorous, left-brain law practice, she has learned how to sculpt words in atypical ways to shift her listeners into experiences beyond words, transforming turmoil into inner peace. For more information, see www.janetsmithwarfield.com; www.wordsculpturespublishing.com; and www.wordsculptures.com.

 

 

 

Two Perspectives on Speaking Our Own Truth

Dec 11
2011

Two Perspectives on Releasing Social Filters and Speaking from the Truth of Who We Are

Dr. Amit Nagpal, New Delhi, India, and

Janet Smith Warfield, J.D., Florida, USA

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Dr. Amit Nagpal’s Perspective

I have suffered a lot in life because I have refused to use filters. Maybe I was born brutally honest and ruthlessly frank!

There have been times when I have told women to their face, “Yes you are looking fat” (when they asked for my opinion). Well that’s my opinion, take it or leave it. I don’t claim to be telling the truth all the time, but yes I am telling my version of the truth, what seems true to me.

Inspired by Gandhi, but a bit more complicated, my autobiography will be entitled, “My Experiments with Complete Truth, Ruthless Frankness and Brutal Honesty.” If I survive for the next 20 years, I will write a brutally honest autobiography. I will tell my version of truth, my failures, my successes, my troubles, my self-inflicted suffering. I don’t care whether people will be interested in reading it; I will write it to give vent to whatever emotions have been trapped inside me due to social filters, and I will write it for myself.

Sometimes I have wondered, “Do people really want to know the truth? Or do they prefer sweet lies and diplomacy? Have I paid too high a price for my brutal honesty? Do Indian and eastern cultures like filters and do not respect straight forwardness? Is there some lack of inner confidence which makes us look for sweet lies and reject bitter truth? Is life already too bitter and we should not make it more bitter by truths?”

I still believe we need to develop inner confidence to speak and hear the truth. In the short term, lies can be sweet. But if I tell an ugly woman, “You look beautiful”, will it change the facts? Will I not spoil my own brand and credibility in the process and give her false hopes? But I also believe, if you have inner beauty it will reflect on your face and will make you beautiful (though not in the traditional sense of the term).

In the long run, truth is always better. But in this fast paced world, who is bothered about the long run?

Anyway, I will try to be kindly honest now.

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Dr. Amit Nagpal is a Personal Branding Consultant, passionate Blogger, and Motivational Speaker based in New Delhi, India. He specializes in personal branding with a holistic touch. His philosophy is “Take Charge of your Life and your Brand” He writes a Blog, “The Joys of Teaching

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Janet Smith Warfield’s Perspective

“Mom, most people function with filters. You don’t.” My oldest son offered this observation after an emotionally-charged family phone conference where my youngest son hung up on us, offended by a remark I had made.

I thought a moment and agreed. “No, I don’t use filters.” I speak my truth from the core of who I am, right here, right now, in this present moment, with these people, surrounded by this environment. It is a unique moment carrying its own energy. I am not willing to mask and distort the energy of who I am with people I love, even when it hurts. I want intimacy in as many relationships as possible.

Yet there are times when I do use filters. I use them when discernment and previous experience have shown me there are people I cannot trust to care for my welfare as they would care for their own. Then I need to use filters to protect both them and me.

Can my truth of the moment change? Absolutely and often quickly when others are also speaking without filters from the core of their own beings. They offer me a perspective I might not previously have thought of or additional information I didn’t previously have.

I do know that speaking from my unfiltered core upsets people who only feel comfortable operating through filters. Is it because I’ve lived every single one of those filters myself and know them well from the inside out? Because I’ve lived them, I can penetrate them. That’s threatening for people who believe their filter is Truth.

My youngest son had commented that there were consequences to my speech and actions. I know that and don’t take either speech or action lightly. But are he and his wife aware that there are also consequences to their speech and actions? Eastern religions call it karma.

So how do we move forward in relationship and collaboration when one person needs filters and the other is functioning from the core of who they are? There’s clearly a misalignment of communication and energies. Intimacy is not possible when people function from filters, although etiquette and polite conversation certainly are.

“I consider myself a pretty good mediator,” my oldest son said, “but I don’t know where to go from here.” Neither did I.

“I think I am simply going to stop taking initiative and stop seeking out relationships with people who need filters,” I said. “If and when they want intimacy, I’m here.” I can still love them. I can pray and meditate for all of us when we’re stuck in our conditioned filters. I can even just keep my mouth shut when I’m around people stuck in filters. But is it worth the price?

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Janet Smith Warfield works with wisdom-seekers who want understanding and clarity so they can live peaceful, powerful, prosperous lives. Through her unique combination of holistic, creative, right-brain transformational experiences and 22 years of rigorous, left-brain law practice, she has learned how to sculpt words in atypical ways to shift her listeners into experiences beyond words, transforming turmoil into inner peace. For more information about Janet, go to www.janetsmithwarfield.com; www.wordsculpturespublishing.com; and www.wordsculptures.com.

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Copyright © 2011 – Janet Smith Warfield. All rights reserved.